December seems to be the best month to do self-reflection. Well…at least for me there are three events in this month which happen to be a very good reason for self-reflection. My birthday, Jesus’ – my savior- birthday a.k.a Christmas and year end. I barely remember things I did this year. I went home twice for my best friends wedding. I attended two conferences. I traveled with my family during my summer vacation. I said good bye to some dear friends here. What else? I met some old friends and unexpectedly one of them become an important person for me. I published a paper. Pretty much things happened actually but my old brain fails to remember all of them.
Sometimes very unexpected moment just happened in our life. I believe, nothing happened simply by coincidence. All moments in our life happened in God’s control and they are happened for some reason. Like it is not a coincidence I messed up my interview for an American oil and gas company by said straight-forwardly that I wanted to continue my study and if I got the chance I would take it. Not a coincidence too that I easily passed the test to continue my study here. Not by chance too, many hurtful events happened before I went here. I kind of see all the reasons He took me here. I learn about my true self. I learn to be honest to myself. And, most importantly I learn about my Creator. He is shaping my characters. I learn to love God and His people. I learn that it is okay to make mistakes, to screw up (not intentionally though) because He knows we are just dust and if we repent and willingly obey Him, in His grace, He will bring us back to His right-path. I learn to lean on His grace.
It is always unexpected, wonderful and thrilling how He works in our life. And no matter How hard things turn out to be, no matter how painful life treats you and no matter how hurtful some struggles are, knowing He always hold us and has control in everything is always be a great reason to embrace and rejoice. Hoping that all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.
With Christmas coming, it is only a week away, I want to just be grateful though these past two month was tough months for me. I do not know that I am this maudlin, cried so much like a little girl. I want to embrace it. I will keep praying for it and see what will happen next. How He will turn things. I want to learn to be obedient (no more being prideful and stubborn, yorina!). Faithfully walks everyday by doing the right things. To give all my best and to love more.
Been listening this song for celebrating Christmas.